Children have a variety of reasons for wanting to quit an activity in which they are involved. Sometimes quitting may be the right choice. Other times sticking it out may be the right option. It’s not always immediately obvious which is the best choice. Here are some things to think about.
Has your child made a commitment to the club?
Sports teams, sometimes a band or orchestra or other group, count on having your child present to participate. He may not be the best player on the team, but teaching him to honor his commitments and finish out the current cycle is a valuable life lesson. He needn’t join for the next cycle if he doesn’t want to.Is your child frustrated with the activities?
Children often get frustrated because their skills are not developed. If your child has put in a significant amount of time and energy and still isn’t mastering the skills to enjoy participating, the club may not be for her.On the other hand, if she’s just starting, encourage her to keep trying. Maybe some private lessons or extra time on the field will improve your child’s skills and give her the confidence she needs to enjoy the club.
Sometimes children get frustrated because they are bored. Is there a way to make the activities more challenging for him? Or can you move him to another level of the same club?
Are other children, or even the leader, bullying your child?
Some amount of teasing is normal when children get together, but out and out bullying – the kind that hurts a child emotionally or physically – isn’t normal or acceptable. If you are unable to resolve the situation by speaking to the leader or coach, removing your child from the situation may be the best option.Occasionally you will run into a situation where the adults in charge are doing the bullying, belittling children who aren’t as skilled. By all means protect your child by letting her quit this situation and consider reporting the leader to the appropriate people.
Is your child the only one?
Clubs often serve a range of ages as well as both boys and girls. Sometimes, however, the evolution of a specific group might mean that your child is the only boy (or girl) or is significantly older or younger than the rest of the group. Some children don’t mind, but if your child is not OK with this, you have a couple of options.First, you could encourage some of his friends to join the group. Second, you could move your child to another division within the same organization that better meets his needs. Either option provides your child with a way to continue participating in a more comfortable environment.
What are the benefits of the club?
Sometimes the benefits or necessities of club membership outweigh a child’s objections. Participating in an after school club while parents are working may be a necessity. Certain club activities can help a child with rehabilitation or therapy. Sometimes, as a parent, you just believe the lessons your child is getting from the club are worth it. In this case, do your best to help your child understand your choice while making the club as enjoyable as possible.Does your child dislike the activity?
Many clubs do a variety of activities. Sometimes your child may not like their current choice, but the next activity could turn out to be a favorite. If your child belongs to a club of this type, encourage her to stick it out through the less than favorite activity. The learning experience itself may be well worth it.If, after your child has given the club a fair try and has honored his commitments, he simply doesn’t enjoy it, why force him? There are plenty of other clubs and choices available. Keep looking -- you might want to review Choosing the Right Club for Your Child for ideas. You’ll find something he’ll enjoy.